There are so many P.G. Wodehouse books in the world, and so many of them are sitting unread on my bookshelves, that I try not to buy more. But I think I must have been tempted by the intriguing title of Wodehouse’s Eggs, Beans and Crumpets, and I’m glad I did because it meant I could add it to the 1940 Club. It’s also one of his books that I’ve never seen anyone else mention, and that’s enough to make me wonder if I’ve stumbled across an overlooked gem among his vast canon.
Well, the title is fun, but completely irrelevant – it’s a collection of stories from a few different gentleman’s clubs, and Wodehouse has decided to delineate different anonymous members of the clubs by types of breakfast food. Is this a joke he did elsewhere? It’s never explained, and the different foods don’t seem to have any associated traits. Here, for instance, is the opening paragraph of the first story:
A Bean and a Crumpet were in the smoking-room of the Drones Club having a quick one before lunch, when an Egg who had been seated at the writing-table in the corner rose and approached them.
Perhaps he thought of the title first? Anyway, while these various figures are unnamed, most of the stories feature names that P.G. Wodehouse fans will recognise. The Drones Club, of course, appears in many collections of Wodehouse stories – and the first few stories in Eggs, Beans and Crumpets star one of their most prominent members, Bingo Little.
Bingo Little will also be familiar to readers of the Jeeves books. In those, he is perpetually falling in love with different women. By the time of Eggs, Beans and Crumpets he is happily married to a rich novelist. There is something sweet and unusual in Wodehouse about their genuinely affectionate love for one another – but the difficulty that inspires each of his stories is Rosie M. Banks’ (his wife) reluctance to give him any money. Bingo Little also needs money to pay debts, and his sure-fire way to earn it is to gamble on a horse so certain to win that it’s basically just collecting money. Except, of course, the horse always loses and Bingo Little gets himself into increasing difficulties – without, in these stories, Jeeves to save him.
Apparently other stories in Eggs, Beans and Crumpets will differ depending on whether you have the US or UK editions. In my UK edition, other familiar characters who appear in later stories are Ukridge and Mr Mulliner, and quite a few minor characters who recur in Ukridge stories. In some ways it doesn’t particularly matter who the story is about. These gentlemen do have different personalities, but the structure of each story is the same: they get themselves into some sort of fix, and then surprising coincidences help extricate them from it.
While I really enjoyed reading this for the 1940 Club, I think that is the reason I prefer Wodehouse at novel-length. Because there will only be one big denouement where all the pieces brilliantly fit into place, and the hero gets away with whatever risks and blunders they have found themselves in. In Eggs, Beans and Crumpets it was all very fun, but rather repetitive. The same patterns took place in every chapter, without long enough space for the plot to have got as brilliantly convoluted as Wodehouse does at his best.
But, while the plots felt hurried, the writing was as deliciously Wodehousian as ever. There is no equal for his mix of understatement, overstatement, and comic twists and turns of sentences. Even something like this is deliciously funny to me:
The Bean asked what the Bella Mae Jobson affair was, and the Crumpet, expressing surprise that he had not heard of it, said that it was the affair of Bella Mae Jobson.
I could type out the whole book, but here is just one more example – on the snobbery of ailments at a health spa:
The ancient Spartans, one gathers, were far from cordial towards their Helots, and the French aristocrat of pre-Revolution days tended to be a little stand-offish with his tenantry, but their attitude was almost back-slapping compared with that of – let us say – the man who has been out in Switzerland taking insulin for his diabetes towards one who is simply undergoing treatment from the village doc負or for an ingrowing toe-nail. And this was particularly so, of course, in those places where invalids collect in gangs – Baden-Baden, for example, or Hot Springs, Virginia, or, as in Sir Aylmer’s case, Droitgate Spa.
Wodehouse has never been equalled – he hasn’t even been imitated as much as you’d expect – and any time spent with him is reliably delightful. I doubt I’ll remember the details of Eggs, Beans and Crumpets and it isn’t a standout from his library of work – it certainly wouldn’t be one of the ones I’d recommend to a newcomer. But a mid-ranking Wodehouse is still a more entertaining experience than almost any other writer, and I enjoyed every moment.
Just loved reading this, and am always so happy to read about Wodehouse. No one like him. I’m actually rereading just now Something Fresh (or New in the US version – why do they do that?). I am delighting in it as always. The wit, the word usage, the intelligence.
Read this way back in school. Wodehouse was very popular in India at that time. You have made me remember those days. And now I want to read a Wodehouse:)
Gosh really can’t believe you haven’t read about eggs, beans and crumpets. This was my first book which I read while at a comprehensive in the North so no idea why it spoke to me, but a life long live began. Curiously I think I heard about via Desert Island discs or similar R4 program. I was wondering what I had in my shelves that would fit the 1940 club and here’s my answer. Any excuse to read a PGW! Thank you. ( I think I’m a crumpet by nature)
A delightful review of a delightful book :) Ukridge is my favorite Wodehouse character so I’ll read any collection that has some Ukridge in it. I listened to this one free on audible – Jonathan Cecil reads it and he is my absolute favorite.
I never did feel like I understood the eggs, beans, and crumpets thing, though, it does feel like a reference to something else and I’ve never come across the other thing.
This does not sound familiar but I sometimes can’t remember which ones I have read, other than I do like the ones with Lady Constance Keeble – always something fun about seeing one’s name in print.
Gosh, what a good find Simon! I read tons of Wodehouse pre-blog and loved him, but can remember little in the way of detail, so would probably fail to identify the correct characters. But this does rather make me want to go back to him!!
My only adventure into Wodehouse has been Jeeves and Wooster, I foolishly gave them all away years ago and regret not being able to pick then up again on a whim to read. I will seek this out for variety if nothing else.
I was just wondering a day ago how I missed looking up Wodehouse for the 1940 Club and then your review appeared. This does sound like fun, and as you say, even if far from his best, Wodehouse is always worth reading. I don’t think I enjoyed the Ukridge stories as much as others except the one with the dog college.
I’m cautious about reading too many Wodehouse books because I’m saving them for some future time when things are so bad, his books will be the only ones to properly escape into. Although, considering the pandemic and everything else lately, what am I waiting for?
It’s a nice surprise to see Hot Springs, Virginia mentioned in a PG Wodehouse book. I live in this region and the historic pool at Hot Springs was recently restored and is now open to the public.
With the way life is these days, we can all use a bit of Wodehouse to cheer us up!
The title is more of Wodehouse’s vast collection of Edwardian and Edwardian-ish slang! (Alistair Cooke reported one of my favorite Wodehouse-isms, when Wodehouse was talking of critical reviews of his books: “‘Edwardian!’ they hiss. It is not easy to hiss the word ‘Edwardian,’ containing as it does no sibilant, but they manage it.”)
An Egg is a person, as in “he’s a good egg” (or a “bad egg” as might happen).
A Bean is usually an “old bean” — though I suppose rarely “old” in the sense of years but instead more in the length of time that one has known this particular Bean. I suspect that Beans are usually male.
Partridge’s “Dictionary of Slang” gives “crumpet,” when referring to a person, as “a term of endearment (lower class); from late 1890s” but I’ve usually taken it to mean (from context) an attractive girl, preferably unattached.
I’m compiling a list of books with references to baked beans, so when I saw this title, I was planning to read it for the 1940 Club. On the first page, I realised he was just referring to beans in the sense of, “How goes it, old bean?” and, though I’ve never heard anyone actually call someone “a good egg”, I’ve definitely read it. As Jeanne says above, the only context I know for crumpet is in the sense of “a bit of crumpet”, but I never did get round to reading beyond the first page, sadly. It’s so long since I read any Wodehouse, I wouldn’t recognise any of the characters, which would be a shame.
I love this line in your review: “There is no equal for his mix of understatement, overstatement, and comic twists and turns of sentences.”
I tend to re-listen to Jonathan Cecil’s narration of the Jeeves and Wooster books so often that I forget he has vast numbers of other novels. This sounds like a fun one!
Lots of un!
I need to go back to this author, I read a few and really loved them
At one point, I tried to listen to them, but had a hard time with the accent – I studied British English in France, but have been living in the US for 20 years…
So I put him a bit aside, but I need to READ him
Yes, the audiobooks are very, very British English!